January 16, 2006

Startling revelations

It's Monday. I'm working at work. Two annoying things per day is my limit, people!

I am giving you random Monday bullet points of nonsense. Because I took medicine with codeine last night and that is all I am capable of right now. Sorry.

  • Signed the lease for Miracle Apartment TM on Saturday and got the keys. I don't have a decent camera yet, so no pictures. But, damn, it's cute!

  • We started moving on Sunday. I never claimed to be Mensa material, but I was shocked to discover that while one book is not so heavy, 500 books are really, really heavy. Ow. My poor biceps and triceps!

  • Thirty-nine degrees is C-c-c-c-old. That's what the temperature was last night and this morning. Brrrrr.

  • Wells Fargo Bank sucks so much. How much do they suck? They suck so much that I am changing banks this week. They suck for double posting a very large transaction, making me severely overdrawn, thereby causing my debit card to be declined, and telling me that it's "automatic" and they can't do anything about it 'til Tuesday. Washington Mutual, here I come! You can send the thank you card to Wells Fargo, attention Retarded Asshats.

  • Also retarded? People who drive Ford pick-up trucks. They are always riding my ass and freaking me out, especially when I am in a borrowed (Ford)pickup and it's loaded with all kinds of crap that I'm trying to move. Ford stands for "F. Off Retarded Dudes!" Clever aren't I? (Caveat: if you drive a Ford, I am sure you aren't that way. Unless you drive in Orange County, and then I'll have to reserve judgement 'til I see your mad driving skillz myself.)

  • Oh, yeah. I submitted my lil blog for a review at I Talk Too Much a few months ago. Last Friday, I got my long awaited review and, much to my surprise, the bitches were very kind to me. I got 4 smacks (out of 5). I also had my biggest day of traffic ever! Can we say "minor ego boost"? Thank you! (To any and all new readers, Welcome!)

  • Happy MLK, Jr. Day. Keep the dream alive.

  • Also, rest in peace, Shelley Winters. You were a fascinating woman and a terrifically entertaining actress. I will always enjoy your movies.

Note to self: if posting before 9:00 a.m. try revising the post before hitting "publish" twenty times. Thanks.



At 09:37, Blogger Rude Cactus said...

I was told many years ago that Ford stood for Found On Road, Dead. I've refused to drive one since.

At 11:28, Blogger jo-fo said...

I've heard Ford stands for Fucked Over Refined Dodge. Of course, being that I don't really like Dodge's either it doesn't mean so much to me. I prefer Fixed Or Repaired Daily. That about sums up my Dad's experiences with his Fords.

At 14:15, Blogger Jesse said...

Pick-up trucks for casual city driving is all kinds of lame. I hate trucks, and SUVs and big vans. I think everyone should drive three wheeled cars, and cover them in pillows so accidents are like a sleep-over. ANd maybe include some twinkie dispensers in the dash board.

At 06:00, Anonymous mooalex said...

Oh, you are SO right on about the Ford truck thing. Dickhead drives one... how much more retarded can you get?!?

At 06:44, Blogger Craig said...

Even more scary than a review at ITTM, is the Blog Thunderdome (or something like that), where you compete against another blog and you must agree going in that if you lose you will not post for 2 months. This, of course, is why I would never do it and why I wonder why anyone would voluntarily submit themselves to it.

At 17:42, Blogger Snidget said...

LOVE Shelly Winters. And will miss her.

Also - can you send me some of that codeine, missy?


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